Had our game against Tennessee in 2001 not be postponed, things in Gator Nation would be so different. I guess I’m playing the “what if” game again but I want to really think about it. Should they have cancelled that game? It’s debatable and for the record I felt they should have played. America honestly needed a break that Saturday and had they played, the Gators would have beat the Vols. We may have even gone to Auburn later that year and won with a little extra experience heading in. Maybe we beat Miami in the Fiesta Bowl, and maybe we don’t but I get the feeling Spurrier would have stuck around. Had they played that Saturday, Florida would have again embarrassed LSU in the SEC title game and the legend that is Nick Saban would be fiction. If they played that Saturday, I would have gone, just like I will go tomorrow.Am I at all concerned about my safety, sure? Amidst the potential Quran burning and the possibility of a terrorist threat, who wouldn’t be? I know people who have sold their tickets, which is completely understandable. Guess what though. We’re all going to die at some point. It might not be today, or tomorrow but it's going to happen. I really don't think there's anything to worry about tomorrow, but if I could pick where I take my last breath, Florida Field doesn't sound like such a bad option. God Bless America, Go Gators, report any suspicious behavior, Georgia Sucks.
The only people who need to be concerned tomorrow will be wearing USF Jerseys. It’s a win and that’s all there is to it. I guarantee it. If USF beats Florida, I will shut this blog down forever. I’ve signed the contract; it’s in writing. If the Bulls beat the Gators this Saturday, I quit. Consider this game a retirement match for me. Like the Nature Boy Ric Flair and other greats who have lost retirement matches, I’m a man of my word. There’s no way I can come back. The contract is signed and notarized. Just like in any good retirement match, I won’t simply put my career on the line for nothing. What will USF and their pathetic followers have to risk? If they had some sort of title, it would be a title vs. career match. If they had long hair it could be a hair vs. career match. If they were pregnant, they could put the baby on the line. This would be easy if there was a USF blogger people actually read that I could challenge. However USF is pathetic and so this retirement match is one man, nay one voice, against a big group of nothings (when I say they are nothings, I don’t mean they are like The Nothing from The Neverending Story. Only one person actually stood up to The Nothing. The Boy.). 
To put it lightly, I’m confident. We will handedly beat USF. Last week we had one problem which spawned our troubles. If we didn’t have snap errors, we would have looked impressive. Those of you calling for Addazio’s head, just hang on for a few weeks. Last year wasn’t pretty and neither was Saturday but think about it. In 2008 our offense was very impressive but who was Tebow passing it to? He was throwing to Murphy and Harvin without a doubt the two best receivers in that draft. Last year was a talent issue, not Addazio’s total fault. And lets be real, last year’s offense was the Gators’ 8th highest point output ever. The guy’s not so bad. Give him half a season and see how things shape up. We were actually good in the red zone the two times we were there last week so that’s a step forward.
Who cares about the offense as long as our D keeps looking that good? Terrell Austin seemed to have a great scheme. Miami just quit trying to run and thus it was pick city all game long. Despite our lone shining spot, the game as a whole was ugly and obviously if that happens against USF, we’ll only win by 21. Yes, I’m saying we could put the ball on the ground 9 times, 1 more than last week and still get the “W.” USF, I hope you don’t mind me talking to you in the first person, but to be honest, you’re quite the joke. You beat FSU, hooray. Do it for 7 years in a
row and make it look like you played Vandy each time (I count 03). Should we really even classify the Big East as a conference? We took the best of you in the Sugar Bowl and exposed you for what you really are. Like the Joker did with Harvey Dent.Game Prediction: Florida 45, USF 7
So a lot has happened since my last blog, and I want to tell you all about it. First of all, I need to tell all of you something that is my opinion but I’m going to state it as fact. I now feel that my blog is the best blog in the country again. A long time ago my blog was the best and then because of poor management over the years and a general lack of talent it declined. But now it’s definitely back. A new guy is running it, well sort of. He’s been here for four years now but somehow he’s got things back on track. Take my word for it; the blog is back and better than ever.
What assholes would have to talk themselves up like that?
NEWSFLASH: FSU is Back…
Because that’s what they've been telling everyone since WVU took a dive in the Gator Bowl. Why has anyone believed it simply because they keep telling us they are good again? They went up in the rankings because they beat a D2 school. Are you serious? Mike Tyson and company were letting us all know how he was in the best shape of his life before he flat out embarrassed himself before retirement. This is no different. FSU is letting everyone know that it’s different now because that’s what they have to say. How else are they going to con kids into wasting 3 to 5 years of their life? What else are they telling these kids? You’ll get to play running back even though you’re 6’2, slow as hell and rated as one of the best defensive players in the country. Something like that I’m guessing. If FSU is back then so is Steve Guttenberg because I’m sure he’s telling a
whole lot of people how Police Academy 14 is going to be the next Hangover. Don’t mess with the Goot. I still like Oklahoma by an embarrassing amount in the Viper Room Bowl.
So apparently you can be retarded and have a vote in the AP poll. Boise State has 8 first place votes? I’m still a bit baffled by this. Really? They’re 3 and the Gators are 8? Okay. Did any of those 8 people watch as Virginia Tech handed Boise that game? Did anyone see how VT was clearly superior? VT is a guaranteed 2-3 loss team every year and somehow a close win over the Hokies is this big crowning achievement for the Broncos. I honestly feel like I’m taking crazy pills over this whole Boise State thing. No one in their right mind thinks they could run the table in the SEC. If any of those 8 voters really believe they could, they don’t deserve a vote. I don’t think they could run the table in the ACC. I honestly think it goes back to our country being soft. We have to baby everyone and fix every problem and make up for our wrongdoings. Some of these analysts and voters are afraid not to support BSU for fear of being called football racists. It’s like there’s a football civil rights movement going on. Now TCU is getting tossed up there too but why? Because they are actually the fourth best team in the country? I’m by no means an expert but if you read my blog last year, you know I predicted USC, Ole Miss, LSU and FSU to be garbage despite what others thought. Take my word for it; Boise State is just playing their blue turf race card. Hopefully that doesn’t offend anybody. I’m really walking a fine line in this blog trying to be PC. It’s not like I had a “Boise State should drink from their own water fountain” joke. That wouldn’t have been appropriate at all.
So Reggie Bush will lose his Heisman. It should definitely go to Vince Young now, but what a shame for USC. I’m pretty sure The Trojans have the only two Heisman winners who won’t be invited to the ceremony next year. How awesome would it be to see The Juice up there next to Wuerffel clapping it up for this year’s latest sophomore winner? What’s next for the other USC Heisman winners? Marcus Allen, Carson Palmer and Matt Leinart might pose for the sequel to the lemon party.
So last week I disclosed the list of things I had to Google during the course of creating the blog. Well Blogspot (“Blogspot” kind of looks like Bloodsport if you read it fast) is now giving stats and showing what people have Google’d to find my blog. Here is a brief list of some of the popular search queries.
Holly Rowe
Mountie
Voice of the gators
Tugboat wrestler
Frank beamer face
Wayne from the wonder years
WWF tugboat
FSU sucks
Donald Gibb
Riley Cooper
Mysexyriley
Mike Price Alabama
Jason Hervey
80’s White Trash
Lay down and bleed college pep talks (I don’t know what the hell this is)
So right now I’d say that my audience is ranking in high on my patented piece of shit index. I’ve figured out what is accidentally getting people to my site and now I need to capitalize on it, much like a veteran wrestler would capitalize on an unsuspecting referee by grabbing the rope while applying the abdominal stretch (first abdominal stretch reference).
Maybe I should use these as topics to haul in some real classy page viewers.
Conspiracy theories over Owen Hart’s death
Conspiracy theories over Bret Hart’s Survivor Series loss to Shawn Michaels
Where “Parts Unknown” could actually be
What pieces of shit Google
Ex Gator Football players now in porn
How to use the abdominal stretch in a real fight
Did Mr. Arnold ever give Mrs. Arnold a black eye on the Wonder Years?
Was Paul Pfeiffer’s grandmother in the holocaust?
Did Tugboat attend Earthquake’s funeral?
Is Tugboat still afloat? (By afloat I mean alive or actually able to walk)
Does Riley Cooper go to the same doctor as Ron Mexico in Philadelphia?
The Dolph Lundgren ab workout
Did Peter Parker ever find Uncle Ben’s porn stash?
When will Freddie vs. Jason 2 come out?
If Heath Leger got the Oscar posthumously, why didn’t Brandon Lee win for the Crow?
Will Scott Hall baby-sit my kids?
Random Thoughts of the Week
Have you ever met someone and found out that they’re a Gator fan? Cool, right? The conversation is going great and you’re talking about the upcoming season or whatnot. You talk about when you graduated, and they talk about vague things other than graduating from the University of Florida. Not a Gator. It happens to me all the time, and I pass judgment.
FYI, if you meet a guy in the panhandle, he shows you his Florida Gator tattoo that spans his entire calf, and he says he’s a graduate of the University of Florida, don’t believe him. I’ve met that guy.
Whatever happened to the old radio sideline/post game reporter? Brady Ackerman is doing it now but the old guy was definitely better.
So a lot has happened since my last blog, and I want to tell you all about it. First of all, I need to tell all of you something that is my opinion but I’m going to state it as fact. I now feel that my blog is the best blog in the country again. A long time ago my blog was the best and then because of poor management over the years and a general lack of talent it declined. But now it’s definitely back. A new guy is running it, well sort of. He’s been here for four years now but somehow he’s got things back on track. Take my word for it; the blog is back and better than ever.
What assholes would have to talk themselves up like that?
NEWSFLASH: FSU is Back…
Because that’s what they've been telling everyone since WVU took a dive in the Gator Bowl. Why has anyone believed it simply because they keep telling us they are good again? They went up in the rankings because they beat a D2 school. Are you serious? Mike Tyson and company were letting us all know how he was in the best shape of his life before he flat out embarrassed himself before retirement. This is no different. FSU is letting everyone know that it’s different now because that’s what they have to say. How else are they going to con kids into wasting 3 to 5 years of their life? What else are they telling these kids? You’ll get to play running back even though you’re 6’2, slow as hell and rated as one of the best defensive players in the country. Something like that I’m guessing. If FSU is back then so is Steve Guttenberg because I’m sure he’s telling a
whole lot of people how Police Academy 14 is going to be the next Hangover. Don’t mess with the Goot. I still like Oklahoma by an embarrassing amount in the Viper Room Bowl.So apparently you can be retarded and have a vote in the AP poll. Boise State has 8 first place votes? I’m still a bit baffled by this. Really? They’re 3 and the Gators are 8? Okay. Did any of those 8 people watch as Virginia Tech handed Boise that game? Did anyone see how VT was clearly superior? VT is a guaranteed 2-3 loss team every year and somehow a close win over the Hokies is this big crowning achievement for the Broncos. I honestly feel like I’m taking crazy pills over this whole Boise State thing. No one in their right mind thinks they could run the table in the SEC. If any of those 8 voters really believe they could, they don’t deserve a vote. I don’t think they could run the table in the ACC. I honestly think it goes back to our country being soft. We have to baby everyone and fix every problem and make up for our wrongdoings. Some of these analysts and voters are afraid not to support BSU for fear of being called football racists. It’s like there’s a football civil rights movement going on. Now TCU is getting tossed up there too but why? Because they are actually the fourth best team in the country? I’m by no means an expert but if you read my blog last year, you know I predicted USC, Ole Miss, LSU and FSU to be garbage despite what others thought. Take my word for it; Boise State is just playing their blue turf race card. Hopefully that doesn’t offend anybody. I’m really walking a fine line in this blog trying to be PC. It’s not like I had a “Boise State should drink from their own water fountain” joke. That wouldn’t have been appropriate at all.
So Reggie Bush will lose his Heisman. It should definitely go to Vince Young now, but what a shame for USC. I’m pretty sure The Trojans have the only two Heisman winners who won’t be invited to the ceremony next year. How awesome would it be to see The Juice up there next to Wuerffel clapping it up for this year’s latest sophomore winner? What’s next for the other USC Heisman winners? Marcus Allen, Carson Palmer and Matt Leinart might pose for the sequel to the lemon party.
So last week I disclosed the list of things I had to Google during the course of creating the blog. Well Blogspot (“Blogspot” kind of looks like Bloodsport if you read it fast) is now giving stats and showing what people have Google’d to find my blog. Here is a brief list of some of the popular search queries.
Holly Rowe
Mountie
Voice of the gators
Tugboat wrestler
Frank beamer face
Wayne from the wonder years
WWF tugboat
FSU sucks
Donald Gibb
Riley Cooper
Mysexyriley
Mike Price Alabama
Jason Hervey
80’s White Trash
Lay down and bleed college pep talks (I don’t know what the hell this is)
So right now I’d say that my audience is ranking in high on my patented piece of shit index. I’ve figured out what is accidentally getting people to my site and now I need to capitalize on it, much like a veteran wrestler would capitalize on an unsuspecting referee by grabbing the rope while applying the abdominal stretch (first abdominal stretch reference).
Maybe I should use these as topics to haul in some real classy page viewers.
Conspiracy theories over Owen Hart’s death
Conspiracy theories over Bret Hart’s Survivor Series loss to Shawn Michaels
Where “Parts Unknown” could actually be
What pieces of shit Google
Ex Gator Football players now in porn
How to use the abdominal stretch in a real fight
Did Mr. Arnold ever give Mrs. Arnold a black eye on the Wonder Years?
Was Paul Pfeiffer’s grandmother in the holocaust?
Did Tugboat attend Earthquake’s funeral?
Is Tugboat still afloat? (By afloat I mean alive or actually able to walk)
Does Riley Cooper go to the same doctor as Ron Mexico in Philadelphia?
The Dolph Lundgren ab workout
Did Peter Parker ever find Uncle Ben’s porn stash?
When will Freddie vs. Jason 2 come out?
If Heath Leger got the Oscar posthumously, why didn’t Brandon Lee win for the Crow?
Will Scott Hall baby-sit my kids?
Random Thoughts of the Week
Have you ever met someone and found out that they’re a Gator fan? Cool, right? The conversation is going great and you’re talking about the upcoming season or whatnot. You talk about when you graduated, and they talk about vague things other than graduating from the University of Florida. Not a Gator. It happens to me all the time, and I pass judgment.
FYI, if you meet a guy in the panhandle, he shows you his Florida Gator tattoo that spans his entire calf, and he says he’s a graduate of the University of Florida, don’t believe him. I’ve met that guy.
Whatever happened to the old radio sideline/post game reporter? Brady Ackerman is doing it now but the old guy was definitely better.
What I had to Google this Week for the blog
Abdominal Stretch
What to say if your wife asks you, “Do you hate me?”
Retirement match
USC Heisman Winners
The plural of nothing
Why are all my friends selling their Gator tickets this week?
Twilight Book Burnings
Would the FBI track me if I blogged the word “Quran?”
What happens if you say “Quran” three times in your blog?
I just blogged “Quran” 3 times and I got a phone call telling me I’m going to die in 3 days. Is this for real?
What if I spell “Koran” with a K?
How much do I have to pay Scott Hall to hang out with him for the day?
What would Steve Babick do?
Things “a friend of mine” Google'd this week
Brandon Spikes sex tape
Stubhub Monday Night Raw Tickets
Facts of the Week
The Florida Gators have not lost to one of the current Big East schools since 1991 versus Syracuse (We lost to Miami in 2003 but they are not a current Big East school).
Florida has not lost a game versus a Florida school since 2003.
Must Watch Web
Ivan Drago’s Comeback
Brandon Spikes sex tape
Stubhub Monday Night Raw Tickets
Facts of the Week
The Florida Gators have not lost to one of the current Big East schools since 1991 versus Syracuse (We lost to Miami in 2003 but they are not a current Big East school).
Florida has not lost a game versus a Florida school since 2003.
Must Watch Web
Ivan Drago’s Comeback
Drago's got a good lookin set of tits!
Weekend Football Forecast
Slap in the face pick
Vandy over LSU: LSU is in bad shape, nearly losing to a dismantled Tar Heels squad. If UNC gets those guys back, they could make big waves with serious BCS implications.
Picks
Slap in the face pick
Vandy over LSU: LSU is in bad shape, nearly losing to a dismantled Tar Heels squad. If UNC gets those guys back, they could make big waves with serious BCS implications.
Picks
OU over FSU
Miami over Ohio State
Alabama over PSU (don’t be shocked if it’s close)
Oregon over Tennessee (I think the Vols make it respectable)
South Carolina over UGA
Cal over Colorado
Michigan over Notre Dame
USC over UVA (I’d love to be wrong)
Last Week’s Record: 5-4
2009 Season Record: 59-43
Current Championship Predictions:
BCS: Nebraska
SEC: Florida
ACC: Miami
Big East: UConn
Big 10: Ohio State
Big 12: Nebraska
Pac 10: Oregon State
BCS Buster: TCU unfortunately. I refuse to put Boise. A little civil disobedience on my part.
If you have any questions, comments, or hate mail, please email me at VoiceoftheGators@gmail.com. I want to get a fan mail segment going so please drop a line.
Follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/Voiceofthegator
You’ll get an update every time a new blog is up or you may never hear from me again if we lose to USF this weekend like FSU last year; but they’ve completely recovered from that. They’re back! Until next time.
The Voice of the Gators
USF 17 FSU 7, September 26, 2009
We will always remember.
Miami over Ohio State
Alabama over PSU (don’t be shocked if it’s close)
Oregon over Tennessee (I think the Vols make it respectable)
South Carolina over UGA
Cal over Colorado
Michigan over Notre Dame
USC over UVA (I’d love to be wrong)
Last Week’s Record: 5-4
2009 Season Record: 59-43
Current Championship Predictions:
BCS: Nebraska
SEC: Florida
ACC: Miami
Big East: UConn
Big 10: Ohio State
Big 12: Nebraska
Pac 10: Oregon State
BCS Buster: TCU unfortunately. I refuse to put Boise. A little civil disobedience on my part.
If you have any questions, comments, or hate mail, please email me at VoiceoftheGators@gmail.com. I want to get a fan mail segment going so please drop a line.
Follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/Voiceofthegator
You’ll get an update every time a new blog is up or you may never hear from me again if we lose to USF this weekend like FSU last year; but they’ve completely recovered from that. They’re back! Until next time.
The Voice of the Gators
USF 17 FSU 7, September 26, 2009
We will always remember.
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